


Frosty Alex

by lol-phan-af (lol_phan_af)



Series: 1-800-did-I-ask [60]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Multi, Sickfic, Texting, part two bc I'm suffering rn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-11
Updated: 2016-09-11
Packaged: 2018-08-14 09:15:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,944
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8007580
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lol_phan_af/pseuds/lol-phan-af
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>little lion: IS GOD KIDDING</p><p>johnn: ???</p><p>little lion: ITS NOT EVEN FALL YET</p><p>johnn: ????????????</p><p>little lion: IM SICK</p>
            </blockquote>





	Frosty Alex

**little lion** : IS GOD KIDDING

**johnn** : ???

**little lion** : ITS NOT EVEN FALL YET

**johnn** : ????????????

**little lion** : IM SICK

**little lion** : LIKE MY TEMPERATURE IS AT 102 AND SOMEONE PLEASE COME AND CUDDLE ME BUT ALSO DO NOT TOUCH ME

**johnn** : you can't have both

**little lion** : but I wANT BOTH

**johnn** : babe

**little lion** : can you get me cold medicine at Anywhere

**johnn** : we have some in the medicine cabinet

**little lion** : yes but I am in the kitchen on the floor hacking up a lung

**johnn** : oh dear

**johnn** : yes I have it

**johnn** : why do we have children's benadryl

**little lion** : I don't like pills

**little lion** : also it works anyway if I take four tablespoons of it

**johnn** : I love you so much

**little lion** : I love you too but please bring me my medicine

**johnn** : I'm coming

\---

**laf** : I come home to john sitting on the floor feeding alex a Red Substance

**laf** : is this how I find out you're vampires

**little lion** : read up

**laf** : oh alexander

**laf** : !!!alex protection squad!!!

**little lion** : nO

**laf** : YES

**little lion** : NO BC I FEEL GROSS AND I JUST WANT TO SLEEP AND BE GROSS

**little lion** : IM SLEEPING ON THE COUCH ALSO

**laf** : no you're not

**little lion** : I DONT WANT TO GET YOU SICK

**laf** : I WILL SACRIFICE MY HEALTH TO CUDDLE YOU

**little lion** : I WONT

**laf** : TOO BAD ITS MY CHOICE

**little lion** : L AF

**laf** : YOURE NOT SLEEPING ON OUR COUCH JUST BC YOU DONT WANT TO GET US SICK ITS NOT HAPPENING

**little lion** : but what if I want to

**laf** : I will sleep on the couch with you

**little lion** : laf

**laf** : I need soMEONE TO CUDDLE AND YOURE SOFTER THAN JOHN

**johnn** : RUDE

**laf** : HE IS AND YOU K N O W IT

**johnn** : true true I surrender

**laf** : exactly

**laf** : still lov you tho sm everyday

**johnn** : lov you tOO

**laf** : yAY but seriously alex I need someone to cuddle

**little lion** : fine but I better be fuckign GRIPPED

**laf** : you will be trUST ME

\---

**laf** : also why are your clothes on the floor around you

**little lion** : I have a fever

**laf** : ??

**little lion** : you're not supposed to be covered when you have a fever

**laf** : aren't you cold like that

**little lion** : yeah but that's also part of the fever

**laf** : I want to take care of you so badly

**little lion** : no you're letting me do this on my own

**laf** : why!!!!

**little lion** : bc I gotta I'm very good at it

**laf** : babe

**little lion** : I used to have a fear of getting sick and now that I'm sick aLONE I have to handle it aLONE

**laf** : false

**little lion** : please

**laf** : aLEX

**little lion** : I hAVE TO

**little lion** : IM GOING TO TAKE A BATH IN COLD WATER AND IM LOCKING THE DOOR IF YOU PICK IT I WILL LIGHT YOU ON FIRE

**laf** : you actually

**laf** : took matches with you

**little lion** : dO YOU THINK THIS IS A GAME

**johnn** : """"YOU CANT ASSIGN ARSON TO A PERSON"""" -ALEXANDER HAMILTON

**little lion** : HUSH

\---

**more like HUNKules** : so when john said ""alexander hamilton"" I started thinking

**more like HUNKules** : when we get married are we all keeping our names

**johnn** : well I mean we can't get legally married so like

**more like HUNKules** : but if we cOULD

**johnn** : what order would it be in

**more like HUNKules** : hercules mulligan-hamilton-lafayette-laurens

**more like HUNKules** : I can't have that many names

**johnn** : why am I last

**more like HUNKules** : my name and then alphabetical order

**johnn** : oh

**johnn** : john laurens-hamilton-lafayette -mulligan

**little lion** : alexander hamilton-lafayette-laurens-mulligan

**johnn** : the only one who gets to have it in alphabetical order

**little lion** : :^))))))

**laf** : marie-joseph paul yves roch gilbert du motier, marquis de lafayette hamilton laurens  mulligan

**johnn** : why don't you get the dashes

**laf** : my first name is marie-joseph you don't get to do this to me

**johnn** : can I call you marge

**laf** : if you want to die at 26 then sure

**johnn** : I'll pass

**laf** : thought so

\---

**little lion** : does anyone want to bring me my laptop bc I just sneezed and almost dropped my phone in the bath and I need to put all my photos somewhere in case it happens

**laf** : bless you

**little lion** : thank you

**johnn** : I'll do it if you delete the photos I sent you like last week

**little lion** : but I like those ones

**johnn** : I can't have those on a bigger scale screen

**little lion** : they're cute tho

**johnn** : you can't call nudes cute that isn't how it works

**little lion** : I mean I'm not wrong tho

**laf** : where was I when this was happening

**more like HUNKules** : rt

**little lion** : idk

**johnn** : it was the day we found out alex still had his ears pierced

**laf** : I'm hurt

**johnn** : THEYRE NOT CUTE NUDES

**little lion** : THEY A R E

**johnn** : FALSE

**little lion** : I CANT BELIEVE THIS SOMEONE BRING ME MY LAPTOP THAT ISNT JOHN

**johnn** : RUDE

**laf** : ILL DO IT

**little lion** : YAY

\---

**laf** : where is the key to the bathroom

**little lion** : in the lube drawer under the stuff we own but don't talk about

**laf** : got it

\---

**laf** : they're cute

**johnn** : I can't believe this I want a divorce

**laf** : like 8/10 cute

**johnn** : where the fuck are the other two points

**johnn** : if I'm gonna disagree it's gotta be with something worth agreeing on

**johnn** : 8/10 is pathetic

**laf** : two points deducted for the fact that these weren't sent to me

**johnn** : oh,,,my god

\---

**laf** : how much soup is enough for four people

**little lion** : yoURE NOT ALLOWED TO TAKE CARE OF ME

**laf** : TOO BAD YOU AS SH OL E IM TAKING CARE OF YOU BC YOURE MY HUSBAND AND I LOVE YOU AND IF YOU DONT FUCKING GET OUT OF THAT BATH SOON YOURE GONNA NEED ME TO TAKE CARE OF YOUR FUCKIGN FUNERAL ARRANGEMENTS BC YOURE GOING TO GO INTO SHOCK AND BE DE A D

**johnn** : the amount of aggressiveness just,,,,,packed into the declaration of love

**little lion** : okay wow okay

**little lion** : first of all it's only if I'm bathing in ice cold water that I'd go into shock

**little lion** : second of all I didn't know you cared that much

**johnn** : lafayette just slid down to the floor staring at that message

**laf** : I

**laf** : you?????

**johnn** : oh no

**laf** : aRE MY HUSBAND???? DO YOU REALLY THINK I DONT CARE ABOUT YOU ENOUGH TO TAKE CARE OF YOU WHEN YOURE SICK????

**laf** : WEVE BEEN DOING THIS SINCE FUCKIGN 2012 DO YOU A C T U AL L Y THINK IM NOT HEAD OVER HEELS IN LOVE WITH YOU AND WOULD JUST TOTALLY LET YOU SUFFER IN A COLD BATHTUB WHEN I CAN EASILY

**laf** : N O T

**laf** : DO THAT????

**laf** : LIKE ALEXANDER

**laf** : ARE YOU KIDDING ME

**laf** : I WOULD LITERALLY LIGHT THE ENTIRE PLANET O N F I R E IF IT MEANT YOU BELIEVING THAT ILL ALWAYS TAKE CARE OF YOU NO MATTER WHAT IM SO MAD RN

**johnn** : why are you mAD

**laf** : BC HE DOENS TN THINKT THAT WE C A R E AND THATS LITERSLLAY SO STUPIID AND HES SO SMART AND BEAUTIFUL AN D THEN HE JSUT

**johnn** : okay true true

**little lion** : I'm crying rn

**laf** : haha I'm getting you out of the bathtub

**little lion** : fine

**laf** : haha I love you

**little lion** : I love you too

\---

**little lion** : when lafayette lets you hug them while naked and soaking wet

**laf** : you're sobbing did you think I was going to let you just stand there

**little lion** : yes

**laf** : dO I HAVE TO GO OFF AG AI N

**little lion** : no I'm fine I got it

**laf** : good

**little lion** : tiME TO TAKE MY TEMPERATURE

**laf** : oh god

\---

**little lion** : do I have to change the thermometer condom thing if I was the last one who used it

**more like HUNKules** : I will literally pay you actual money to never say thermometer condom again

**little lion** : I'm gonna change it anyway just to be safe

**more like HUNKules** : actual literal money

\---

**little lion** : I WENT DOWN ONE DEGREE WHAT THE FCKU

**laf** : SOUP! SOUP! SOUP! SOUP!

**little lion** : I would make four fam sized cans

**laf** : WHY

**little lion** : bc we can all eat a fam sized can of soup and I'm not sacrificing my chicken pieces bc y'all are greedy

**laf** : do we have a saucepan big enough for this

**little lion** : only one way to find out love

**laf** : right

\---

**johnn** : why,,,,have you taped ice,,,,,to your chest

**little lion** : bc I'm too lazy to get washcloths from the bathroom and make them cold

**johnn** : I'll do it

**little lion** : I feel like I'm annoying you all

**laf** : never

**johnn** : I promise you're not but alex

**johnn** : ice

**johnn** : taPed to your body

**little lion** : I am a revolutionary john

**johnn** : and I am a person who is divoRCING YOU IMMEDIATELY 

**little lion** : RUDE

**laf** : SOUP! SOUP! SOUP! SOUP!

**little lion** : coMING

**more like HUNKules** : casually totally didn't just wake up

**laf** : come and eat

**more like HUNKules** : omw

\---

**little lion** : coLD COMPRESS

**johnn** : VERY WARM ALEXANDER

**little lion** : I have a feVER WHAT DID YOU EXPECT

**johnn** : I know but yoURE LITERALLY ON F I R E

**little lion** : FIRE!!! HELLFIRE!!!

**johnn** : YEAH P CLOSE

**little lion** : I'm very cold and vERY sweaty

**johnn** : I'm so worried about you

**little lion** : NO NEED

**johnn** : you sneezed three times just trying to type that message

**little lion** : and yet I remain unblessed

**johnn** : bless you

**little lion** : thank you

\---

**little lion** : I'm sleeping on the couch

**laf** : then so am I

**little lion** : I'm sleeping on many bags of ice and our bed does not need that

**little lion** : you do not need that

**laf** : are you more concerned with breaking your fever or Healing  
  
**little lion** : I'm sleeping on bags of ice can you guess

**laf** : you handle taking care of your fever

**laf** : I handle the rest

**little lion** : laAaaAaAaAaAaF

**laf** : WEVE ALREADY HAD THIS CONVO YOU CANT GET OUT OF IT

\---

**laf** : alexander is asleep!!

**laf** : on mANy bags of ice

**laf** : he still has his glasses on aw

**laf** : snatched those so they don't break

**laf** : again

**johnn** : I wanna cuddle him

**laf** : me too

**johnn** : he's gonna be super mad at us tho

**laf** : fuck true

**laf** : LETS DO IT ANYWAY

**johnn** : OKAY

\---

**johnn** : frosty alex

**laf** : st O p

**more like HUNKules** : you can't just sleep next to alexander without me

**laf** : he only has two sides hercules

**more like HUNKules** : I can just lie across all of you it's chill

**laf** : hE IS THE LIGHTEST SLEEPER YOU CAN T

**more like HUNKules** : fine I'll lie behind laf bc they've never used the phrase ""frosty alex""

**johnn** : frosty alex is real and I believe in him

**more like HUNKules** : goodnight

\---

**little lion** : I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU HURT ME THIS WAY

**little lion** : I TLDLO YOU NOT TO CUDDLE ME

**little lion** : unbelievable I'm going to take my temperature and hope

\---

**little lion** : MY FEVER IS BROKEN

**little lion** : 99.7!! TAKE THAT GOD

**johnn** : did you just break the thermometer

**little lion** : yeah I might have done that yes

**johnn** : come back to the couch we can talk abt it later

**little lion** : okay

**johnn** : hot frosty alex has become truly Frosty and he's still sick but at least he's not hot frosty

**little lion** : I

**little lion** : go back to sleep

**johnn** : kay

**johnn** : gn frosty alex

**little lion** : end it

**Author's Note:**

> haha I had work today for like,,,9 hours which is actually shorter than usual and I want to die but here this is


End file.
